Good morning, I pray the Lord is blessing you as you have all blessed me by being here. Today, we will read 1 Corinthians chapters 5–8, focusing especially on chapter 7.
I have the honor of being married to the same woman for over thirty-two years. An old friend of mine used to joke that he had been married to his wife for many years, and they had gone by like five minutes. He would pause, then add, “underwater.” While I am sure he didn’t mean it, and I certainly have no regrets, I can empathize with the sentiment.
Marriage and Its Challenges
On social media, I am often contacted by single women, mostly divorced, who inquire if I am married. I proudly state that I am. They will still try to get personal with me, and I will shut them down. I have no interest in other women.
Sometimes, they will ask what has made my marriage last for so long. The only answer I can give them is God. I will explain that I had three much shorter marriages. Marriage is hard. When we see romance in movies and on television, it looks like it is all passion and heat. In reality, that isn’t even romantic, usually, and certainly not love.
Paul addressed sexual immorality in 1 Corinthians 5:1–2, and then turned to the counterpoint in chapter 7. When we are married to a person, which God has ordained, we will have troubles: “But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this” (1 Corinthians 7:28). He is not wrong. Yet God gave us marriage to channel our natural desires into a holy covenant. When we respect the establishment and treat our spouses as Paul describes, we will also experience many joys.
Surrender, Not Compromise
There will be struggles and fights—that is part of our sin nature (Romans 7:18–19). Some of this stems from our desire for sin. However, when we trust in God and His will for our lives, we return to His Word and understand that we must give ourselves completely to our spouse. It isn’t about compromise, as society teaches, but about surrender (I Corinthians 7:4). “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25). When a husband loves his wife and commits to doing one-hundred percent of what will please her, he fulfills the calling God gives us as husbands. Of course, this is always within reason—we would not sin to please her.
Then God will intervene, I believe, and cause her to do the same for her husband. This looks like a compromise, but without the problem of judging whether we are getting a fair deal. Our concern is not with an equal distribution, but with providing the full measure we have to give.
Christ as the Bridegroom
This is a model for how we should approach our relationship with God as well. Christ is our Bridegroom, and we are His bride (Revelation 19:7; Ephesians 5:32). We should not be thinking about what we get from Him, but only what we can give to Him. Trusting that whatever He gives us is more than we deserve, we remain forever grateful for anything He determines to provide.
When we live with these two relationships—marriage and faith—based on total surrender, we find harmony. Then the relationships we have with others become easier too. We learn to be content with knowing we are in God’s will (Philippians 4:11–13). The outcome is never about coming out on top, but only about being a servant. Focusing on winning makes us struggle to find happiness. We celebrate the victory when we focus on showing Christ.
The Sin Nature and Transformation
Only when people find joy in Christ are they fulfilled, and He changes their hearts to rejoice in giving more than receiving (Acts 20:35).The problem is we still have to deal with our sin nature (Galatians 5:17). This causes us to fight against doing what we know we should. The problem is we get bitter and look for equality. I was a bartender for years and heard men and women both complaining about their spouses. Both sides in a relationship feel they are giving more than the other. When people find joy in Christ, He changes their hearts so they find more joy in giving than receiving (Acts 20:35).
I had three failed marriages before I met my wife. Looking back, I can see how this “measuring stick” thinking and false idea of somehow always being happy can lead to failure. I did not learn that with age. It was through salvation that the Lord changed how I view relationships (2 Corinthians 5:17). Now I continue to find joy in the daily walk we both have with Christ.
Tomorrow, we will read 1 Corinthians 9-11.